Chapter Zero:
“You are under arrest” said THE MAN.
“Eat Lead, Copper.” said Merle.
and THE MAN did…
They were at a remote marijuana plantation in Humboldt County and Merle was not about to let Federal Law Enforcement interfere with his profit.
Too Bad, So Sad for THE MAN’s next of kin but everyone voluntarily selects their own career… It appears that THE MAN’s choice was not the most brilliant idea.
The next puzzle was how to dispose of the body… Ecologically…
This area of the woods is home to BEARS and BIGFOOT… Someone was going to get a free lunch… and here comes one now…
“DANG” exclaimed Susan “These reality TV Shows are SOOOOO predictable… The criminal always gets caught in the end. BORINGGGGG. I’m changing channels right now. ”
CLICK.
“Whoosh” went the speaker in the TV set.
“Oh Boy, A Space Opera. ” said Susan.
“Whoosh-whoosh” went the speaker in the TV set.
“Who are you talking to?” aske Bob as he entered the room with a pizza, six pack of Sierra Nevada Beer and a big ol’ bag a weed…
“Nunya Beeswax” said Susan.
“Whoosh-whoosh-whoosh-KA BLOOOEY!” went the speaker in the TV set.
“Wow, Look at that!” said Bob.
“The SLIME from the dead alien is dripping onto the floor” said Susan.
“And it stinks” said Bob.
“That’s ABSURD. These new TV sets from [product placement] with ‘SMELL-O-VISION’ are more trouble than they are worth.”
CLICK.
TALKING HEAD: “In other news, Dr Ron Paul has accepted the Republican Party Nomination for President of the United States. We go live to the convention floor where a riot has broken out. ”
CLICK.
“Wait a second, go back to that news report. That’s an event that DID NOT HAPPEN.”
“Oh don’t be surprised, it’s FOX news… they often write fiction and present it on the TV as news. ”
“Are you sure? They seem so sincere.” said Bob
“Yep, they have meetings, get blasted on mind altering substances and write collaborative fiction…” replied Susan
“Sounds good to me. Would you like a puff?”
“Yes. We’ve got some fiction to write ourselves… because this story is starting to drag.” Exhaled Susan
“Hey, I’ve got an idea!” Let’s watch CNN, they tell the truth…
CLICK.
“In other news, President Obama Legalized Medical Marijuana today. Stating, “I was wrong… I asked my doctor and she said there IS medicinal value to Medical Marijuana… So we have stopped the DEAth Squads… ” said the talking head.
Oh… CNN has gone NATIVE also… have we a distortion of the space-time continuum? asked Susan.